The Stoic Associate: How to Deal with Feedback and Worry Less

The Stoic Associate: How to Deal with Feedback and Worry Less

When I was a young associate, every time I sent an email to a partner or client that included work product or a bit of analysis I found myself eagerly anticipating a “pat on the back” email back in my inbox. As you may have guessed, those pats on the back rarely came.

That’s life in a law firm! But it’s a lesson that took me some time to learn. Too often, I found my mood shifting with the winds – and whims – of the day’s feedback. What I finally learned is that as a law firm associate you need to learn to look for approval within yourself, and not from external sources.

But that’s easier said then done. In order to have that type of measured mindset, young associates need some tools in their toolboxes. One of the most effective is an “oldie but goodie” called Stoicism.

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Sometimes You Need to Throw a Right Hook

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Sometimes You Need to Throw a Right Hook

Well known social media marketer Gary Vaynerchuk authored a book called “Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook.” It’s all about brand building, marketing, and developing business in today’s digital environment.

The central thesis is that in order to stand out and gain your audience’s attention, you need to give, give, give before asking for someone’s business. Giving can take many forms, but in the social media world it most often means producing valuable, relevant content for your audiences.

I believe that Vaynerchuk wrote the book because he believes that too many people are throwing too many right hooks, and not enough jabs. They’re blasting people with offers and asks, and not giving freely of their wisdom in order to build authentic relationships online and off.

But sometimes I think that a right hook can, itself, be a jab. After all, if you believe that the services you provide can genuinely help solve some of the toughest problems that members of your audience face, then you’re doing them a disservice by not introducing your solutions to them. Just as it’s easy to get caught up in a cycle of selling and never providing value, it’s also easy to publish, publish, publish and never share the skills and experience that underlie your content.

Beware the False Comfort of Conventional Wisdom When Building a Legal Practice

Beware the False Comfort of Conventional Wisdom When Building a Legal Practice

“What would happen if I did the opposite?”. It’s an approach that worked for George Costanza in a classic Seinfeld episode, but it’s rarely something we think about – let alone act upon – in real life.

Doing the opposite – going against the grain, bucking conventional wisdom – can be scary. It can result in failure. It welcomes skepticism. It invites derision. It makes people uncomfortable. It’s especially frowned upon in the slow-to-innovate legal industry.

It is also the indispensable action that is inextricably linked to virtually every breakthrough idea that has moved the needle of human progress forward.

Conventional wisdom is, by definition, a generally accepted theory or belief. Any action or idea that is contrary to conventional wisdom is, therefore, generally not accepted, and the person propounding it is considered wrongheaded and counter-cultural – that is, until the radical is proven right, and the new idea replaces the old. As Albert Einstein said: “The only sure way to never make mistakes is to have no new ideas.”

Put more simply, rejecting conventional wisdom is risk taking.

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Give Freely to Gain Trust and Attention

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Give Freely to Gain Trust and Attention

What’s the first thing that goes through your head when you meet a prospective client, sit down at the keyboard to write an article, or walk up to the podium to give a talk? What motivates you?

For many (too many) of us, it’s the desire to come across as smart, knowledgeable and polished. It’s natural to be internally focused. But being motivated by the desire to leave an individual or audience dazzled typically has the opposite effect.

I recently attended a conference and at one of the opening cocktail parties I completely forgot this lesson. I engaged in conversation with a nice gentleman and we chatted at each other instead of genuinely listening to what the other person was saying. Instead of probing for common interests, we focused on getting our points across. It ended up being a waste of time, full of awkward pauses and poorly delivered “elevator speeches.”

This poor interaction reminded me of what it takes to have a positive one: We benefit far more when we seek nothing in return. When we share our time, attention and wisdom freely, with no reciprocal expectations, we build relationships of the best kind – the ones built on a strong foundation of trust.

So the next time you approach an interaction, be it in person or via the written word, ask yourself a simple question: How much can I give my audience without expecting anything in return?

Your Personal Brand is Your Story

Your Personal Brand is Your Story

There’s no great dictionary definition of what a personal brand is. One of the most often cited colloquial definitions is from Jeff Bezos. The point Bezos is making is that a personal brand is a story.

“Your brand is what people say about you when you’re not in the room.”

In other words, your personal brand is impacted and shaped by everything you do – and don’t do – to put your best foot forward. If clients are going to buy from you, they need to understand who you are, what you stand for and the value you bring to the table.

Sure, some clients buy sight unseen, but in most lawyers’ experiences those are not the best type of clients. The most meaningful, satisfying, and profitable engagements typically come from situations where clients come to you for a very specific reason. They know who you are, have done their due diligence, and oftentimes have received a referral from someone they trust.

There’s strong alignment between what they need and what you offer.

Fear, Ego, and an Endless Cycle of Poor Decisions

Fear, Ego, and an Endless Cycle of Poor Decisions

I live in a small town in northern Michigan called Traverse City. It’s a quaint, picturesque town of 17,000 residents, although the population, hustle and bustle of the area swells during the summer months. People flock from all over the world to enjoy the beauty of Lake Michigan and the incredible food, wine and craft beer scene that this region offers.

Over the last five years (my family has lived here two years), Traverse City has experienced tremendous growth, both in its primary industries of tourism, hospitality and agriculture, as well as new industries such as technology. There’s even a new tech incubator here, and an angel fund that was formed to help attract and cultivate the growing number of startups in the area.

The entrepreneurial scene is booming. Interesting and creative new businesses are opening every week here. Young people and young families looking for a different way of life continue to migrate here from busy urban areas at a steady clip. They’re building businesses around their lives, rather than lives around their businesses. A risk taking ecosystem and ethos has taken hold.

But it wasn’t always this way. In fact, it wasn’t at all this way just a few years ago. And it didn’t happen by accident.

Lawyers With Strong Personal Brands Operate with Clarity of Purpose and Consistency of Effort

Lawyers With Strong Personal Brands Operate with Clarity of Purpose and Consistency of Effort

Lawyers with strong personal brands stand for something. And for those with the strongest brands, “something” means one thing. They are master craftsmen, rather than jacks of all trades.

The jack of all trades lawyer is busy, bouncing from project to project, learning a little about a lot. Clients think of a jack of all trades when price is a primary consideration. The master craftsman lawyer is also busy, but focused. She knows a lot about a little and is able to charge a price premium as a result.

The objective of becoming a lawyer with a strong personal brand is to make it clear to the market the precise types of problems that the well-branded lawyer can solve. A strong personal brand allows a lawyer to transform from hunter to hunted. Clients seek her out because her value proposition is clear and has been validated through her experience, reputation, thought leadership and the word of mouth of others she’s worked with and against. She knows – and the market knows – what she does, how she does it, and for whom. Success follows.

To Scale Your Business, Grow Your Personal Brand

To Scale Your Business, Grow Your Personal Brand

You can scale a business. We see it all of the time in the tech world, where startups work furiously to scale up and build infrastructure to manage and absorb growth when the time comes.

But can people scale? It’s an issue that many lawyers and other professional service providers struggle with. You’re one person, with tremendous demands on your time due to the needs of your clients, colleagues and firm (not to mention your personal life).

And business development in professional services is still an intensely personal endeavor. You need to be out there, meeting people, developing and spreading your reputation among potential clients and referral sources. It takes time and energy – both resources in short supply for most lawyers.

You can’t clone yourself, so your ability to scale yourself is limited. You can’t be everywhere, focused on everything, all at once.

Or can you?

Start Fast, Start Smart: Introducing a New Column for Attorney At Work

Start Fast, Start Smart: Introducing a New Column for Attorney At Work

A great deal has been said and written about the epidemic of the unhappy lawyer. Surveys suggest that career dissatisfaction among lawyers, and even rates of depression, are on the rise. According to research published last year, 28 percent of lawyers experience mild or higher levels of depression.

Associate attorneys are not immune from this issue. In fact, a survey from a few years back found that “associate attorney” was the unhappiest job in the United States. Many theories are posited as to the root causes, including overwork, stress, uninteresting work and the adversarial nature of the law. In recent years, firms have increasingly been urged to improve culture and expand opportunities for work-life balance, particularly for young associates. Firms need to change, the thinking goes, to adapt to the needs and desires of millennials.

This is a topic that is of great interest to me. And it’s one of import and urgency. After all, how can the profession expect to continue to perform at high levels if the young lawyers in the profession (at least large numbers of them) are dissatisfied with the work they spend such a massive amount of time on?